| = padding|
|Diana, I hope you can receive critics. |
i consider this text just an exercise for imagination. it indulges too much in verbosity and logics pertaining only to the structures of conversation. there is no strong message, nothing memorable to fill our pockets with, after reading it.
briefly, it's too [mirror-into-mirror].
i see that you have the courage to channel your full attention to finding a home in whatever you're writing, but please consider first that you are adressing to a reader, who is quite pretentious.
other tips: less is more sometimes. language should be only an ingredient.
& do not rely on cliches.
now that i've made you think,
let me tell you
that i'm looking forward to seeing how your next text will look like. ;)
| = A promise|
|Veronica, you are my witness, while I'm taking the first steps in English creative writing. I want to apologize for putting you in the situation of having to read my silly work, but I PROMISE I will improve once my vocabulary enlarges. And by the end of this year I hope to make you proud of my work!|
| = .|
i'm sure it will become a fact