| = thank s that there is an sign from an editor | Anni- Lorei Mainka [07.Aug.12 10:01] |
| Would you be so kind and tell me directly : what you mean with "revised"? These poems are a part from a poem-book which an editor sign with ok. Thank you. | |
| = . | Veronica Vãleanu [07.Aug.12 10:10] |
| [autumn's door] instead of [the autumn's doors] [will be] instead of [we'll be] [mind] [bones] | |
| = thks | Anni- Lorei Mainka [07.Aug.12 12:25] |
| You're so nice to tell me what you ve seen: I've written "the autumn's doors", because it's a special "autumn"...that means "the"...and they are a plural. Thk. for your time. | |
| = sorry to disturbe you | Anni- Lorei Mainka [07.Aug.12 16:23] |
| Yes, you decide here, and it is right so. But in more than one way it is still a difficult situation...perhaps the Romanians are right when they tell me their stories...hope to be so good for an editor and become more than an workshop mask. | |
| = . | Veronica Vãleanu [07.Aug.12 18:52] |
| you aren't disturbing anyone it's not outrageous to be in the situation of having extraordinary texts and less extraordinary ones. As for my assessing this text in the category of [workshop] these are the facts: first you submitted a text with some grammar and spelling mistakes; I put [to be revised] thinking that you will double check it also considering its weaknesses, at the level of getting across the message. [to be revised] can also imply making improvements. as long as you find a moment to think about it, you will see those weaknesses: -it's too fragmentary; and a fragmentary type of discourse that has a problem dealing with expressing itself. Here it it important that I should remind: the desired message may not be of the same quality as your effective message. - repetitiveness: you didn't handle very well what you might have wanted to call leitmotif. it should be like a pillar of construction, upon which a solid architecture should be built -tears will be water to drink/ weaping through moon's eyes/ come on jump - are cliches etc a text in the workshop doesn't mean it will stay there forever; any improvements can save it. | |
| = err | Veronica Vãleanu [07.Aug.12 18:53] |
| getting the message across | |