Members comments:

 =  This poem has potential...
John Willy Kopperud
[14.May.08 22:45]
...and the intensity in the first four lines really hit me!
Why then, does it contain a last line of more than question-
able quality? "masquerade between concrete" has no actual significance in English. I sincerely think you should drop that last line altogether. If you do, Bogdan, this poem becomes outright good!

Cheers from Willy

 =  masquerade between concrete
Bogdan G. Marin
[15.May.08 23:42]
Thank you Willy, I am glad you enjoyed it.

"essence forgotten, nothing speaks" - People today tend more to look at the physical aspect, then the person`s mind, state of spirit. What I call is for understanding, contemplation - because all today is only a "masquerade between concrete" - even so I will delete this verse.

 =  Now this really works...
John Willy Kopperud
[16.May.08 09:09] a poem. Thanks for taking advice!
Cheers from Willy

 =  Willy,
Bogdan G. Marin
[17.May.08 09:41]
Yes will I accept all advices - if they are truly good. Thank you.

 =  hollow fills the silence...
Marius Surleac
[17.May.08 10:10]
Quite interesting text Bogdan. Now we talk here about deep thoughts and ideas. Is a little bit about finding ourselves, finding the virtue and the text has a kind of beautiful noise in a silenced area: "boiling sun", "tempest is hiding". Very good job Bogdan!

Cheers from Marius!

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