= Some errors here: | John Willy Kopperud [12.Oct.08 11:30] |
First: so much dynamite OR so man dynamite BARS. (I used tha last dynamite BAR) And I think you want to express that you TOOK THE SHOCK WAVE ALL ALONE. Cut out THAT I TOOK prior to all the way to drunkenness.Again; dynamite, or a dynamite BAR, gave birth to her. TEARS her away Lastly: The last dynamite BAR strongly sweeps her away. If you accomplish these changes, we'll see about the approving of the text. Cheers from Willy | |
= see you next time, Thanks | Ioana Camelia Popa [14.Oct.08 20:23] |
You mean "dynamite BARS" as "a piece of dynamite"... I don`t mean the shock wave, but the shroud wave, or the veil... it will remain veil, and I will change the topic, where I could`ve done better... | |