= pain | Dely Cristian Marian [29.Jul.12 20:44] |
i could only see your temples, the bracelets... the sweet part is covered up with sensibility. too much pain. i think the second verse may be shorter "I lost almost all my dreams buried in old rubble like a deflated ball of an orphan child" and the third verse looks better to me without the second line and that name. lost feeling, delmar | |
= Thanks | Cristina-Monica Moldoveanu [30.Jul.12 11:07] |
Thanks for your comment delmar and for your careful and insightful reading. I am happy you understood my poem, reading it under your own censorship. But I will not change its form. Hoping your feelings won't be lost in the future, Cristina | |