nothing changes
I find that which I do not seek
meanwhile I keep reading stuff to get sober
for instance about the times when stones used to
attach wings to their sandals and amber cufflinks
greenish twinkles in the sunlight and still felt bitter
I listened to some peoples stories whispered to others`
ears kept talking till they got fed up with loneliness
and rushed away stepping bluntly over my shadow
anyway it is so much easier to endure others than oneself
I again revised all gods´ sakes and their mothers´ names
now I only have to order them alphabetically
and close the damn book
I got savagely drunk on witty words and love facts
my beauty is just as you know it generally doing well
particularly victims and finally undergoing self-destruction like
highly improbable monsters in bad American movies
head-aches are being a pain in my stomach
don’t really remember what is it after I vomit the last illusions into the chloroform jar
every dull morning I throw myself through the penthouse window
towards a new one-way day
with a coffee pot near at hand
every time something else always the same unrepeatable up to excess


then I wondered who’s who in whose indifferent grave
matter of perspective rather than signature
and who can cry louder or be quiet longer
it occurred to me I could see some words all dressed up in negligees
making a show of themselves among sand milk and water
sort of light signals left behind by flying snails on the palm of the text
I carry mine on the other side
walk on wire with my sun umbrella
and watch you swing the orange bicycle on the opposite string
with only one toe
that lady is watching both of us absent-mindedly
and I pretend to be you two-three stanzas short